Federal budget review

Federal budget review It's taken me THIS long to finally read this federal budget section from THE AGE, dated May 9, 2007. It's been sitting on my bed for THAT long, a main reason in why I wanted to read it, was that as a consumer, I should be notified of my benefits I can rip off the government. So here, I list the ones that are applicable to me, or many who also fall into the category of uni/tafe student with elderly people :P Here goes: - Carer payment recipient to get $1000 lump sum. Can I get some for "caring" for an 80 year old :P - Child care benefit increased 10%. Maybe I should start giving birth just to get some "kaching" in my pocket - $2.1 billion to be spent over next decade encouraging young people to join and stay in defence forces. Maybe I should join the army and be MACHO -$457 million for student tuition vouchers. GIMME A TUTOR NOW!!! -Extra $15.8 million over four years to help disadvantaged job seekers, including those with mental illness and drug addictions find employment. YES YES I'm weird and I overdose on Panadol. So help me, help me! -Diabetes, obesity, dental care and medical research are the main recipients for $51.8 million health spending.OK if I start overindulging on sweets and chocolate, and what not, I'll need all the above just in time for next year...and yes dental care AGAIN...no problems you can cut me up for some research..just ignore the fatty tissues :P -$20.6 million extra over the next four years for mental health services. Here, here, look at me, look at me!!! -$566 million for Victorian roads and railways next financial year.WOOP DI DOO DA, make it wider, coz I'm hopeless at driving...please :P -$25 million to upgrade Whitehorse/Springvale Road intersection in Nunawading. YAY that way I can get to my other house easier (I hope) coz traffic sucks there -Junior apprentices to get annual $1000 payment to top up wages. Quit uni, and become an apprentice bricklayer eh? Chick bricklayers HRMMMMM??? -Government to make one-off payment that doubles co-contribution for 2006 for low-to-middle income earners.YAY another $1500 for my retirement -For every $1 of after-tax super contributions, government's co-contribution will be $3 instead of $1.50, up to maximum of $3000 for eligible taxpayers. HEEHEE *sniggers* I'm gonna be filthy rich when I'm 65!!! Gonna use retirement money for house buying, bungee jumping and skydiving, OH what a life for a 65 year old fart. If you wanna enjoy this pleasure and leisure at that age too, start working the superannuation benefits. Those who don't think now, and think "oh I'll be $1000 less of money to spend this year" then you're stupid. That amount will work up to be many thousands, and possibilities of withdrawing that amount earlier is possible to. So why not rip the government co-contributions??? Free money!!! Stupid if you don't (implying brother). Side note-don't kill me, unless you have been guaranteed as a recipient of my superannuation, if I die. -From July 1st, income threshold increased THE NEW TAX RATES Tax rate Thresholds 2006-2007 New Thresholds 2007-2008 New Thresholds 2008-2009 % $ $ $ 0 0-6,000 0-6,000 0-6,001 15 6,001-25,000 6,001-30,000 6,001-30,000 30 25,001-75,000 30,001-75,000 30,001-80,000 40 75,001-150,000 75,001-150,000 80,000-180,000 45 150,000+ 150,000+ 180,000+ Although the real benefits aren't till 2008-2009, there is still a way to get taxed less. Start increasing your tax-deductibles, start donating to those Salvos and ask for a receipt :P Well that's all from your future tax accountant For I am Wendy Ng, remember that name, I won't be tax-deductible, and charge you full fare (friend or no friend) I gotta make a profit somewhere ya know? Yours truly ~Wacky Wendy