Sunday, 1 March 2009

Do you ever wake up and go WOAH...weird dream?

I literally just woke up 5 minutes ago, jumped on the computer just to write this down before I forget.

Do you ever wake up and go WOAH...weird dream?

Well, I'm one of those, a constant one, but often do I forget what happened and just knew it was absolutely random, and wished you didn't watch too many different movies.

This is how it goes, or the least I remember anyways.

You know how things just don't link in background, but just does in another format?

Well, I'm running late to our first class of English, and I'm in the same class as my boyfriend, the teachers new, and my boyfriends a bit slack in getting to class, so he doesn't show. (TRUE)

The English teacher is a short Malaysian with a very strong Malaysian accent, which ponders me how did she get into English and become an English teacher, but she's very nice. I came sorta late and couldn't find a seat, so I had to sit next to a guy. (the set is my old high school, however the students remind me of my primary school guys)

We're passing out notes, and suddenly I'm getting molested on the chest by the guy next to me, and I scream "SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!" and the teacher comes over, and me feeling all so violated. I think he's gotten kicked out of the room, coz I remember her saying "He's a bad one, I'll have to seat him infront of me" in her very fobby sincere Malaysian accent.

Then WOAH change in scenario, change in set, suddenly I'm in a ship with ancient chinese clothing, with a whole bunch of martial kungfu fighting "family" members, fighting baddies down a small stream, that ran between two cemented buildings, which became too tight, and which of my other members was using his strong super strength to make the ship go through further, to which it came to a halt, and we all had to abandon the ship.

...till I got woken up to move my car.

Seriously WEIRD!!!!

Reasons to why I might have a dream like so:
- I had watch 'The Invasion', 'Rescue Dawn', and some ancient chinese TVB drama before going to bed

- The ancient martial arts from the dream probably came from the tv drama

- The ship probably from Rescue Dawn, the idea of trying to escape

- The school environment...maybe from The invasion, where there is lots of people...but who knows, my dreams are always WEIRDWACKYMADNESS!

Sunday, 6 April 2008

So here's what's wrong with me

So here's what's wrong with me

SO I reckon I have pretty bad luck when it comes to personal life VS academic life, or REALLY bad luck ALWAYS!!! Something ALWAYS pops up and stuffs the other one over.

Last semester, it was multiple family members having medical problems right in my mid-semester break, which basically made me feel mental and the need of seeing a counsellor, and having lots of emotional breakdowns. To which a car crash didn’t quite assist the emotional state then, to which I had to get special consideration for uni exams…which I stuffed up the deferred exams too.

Do you reckon I have an anxiety problem? Not really, I can relax and let my mind go, so I don’t believe my current condition is an anxiety problem.

So what happened this time with me, you say?!?! Again during my mid-semester break, it was MY turn to go to hospital and have health problem. Easter Saturday I got bitten by something that made my hand swell up, as well as multiple mosquitos swelling my arms up too, whilst @ Shoreham. Easter Sunday, hand went crazy and was like the size of a grapefruit, uncontrollable hand tremor began and sent to Rosebud Hospital, as it was accompanied with dizziness and headaches.

HATE HOSPITALS!!!! 6+ hours, sit in three different waiting rooms till having to see a doctor, and getting stung by more mosquitoes. Finally getting to the doctor, they stab my left hand with antibiotics, which DIDN’T get through to the vein, and hence stabbed again in my right arm. So received a big ass bruise in my left hand, and hand tremor in the right hand, so I felt REALLY disabled for the first couple of days after that.

Problem is that till today, exactly two weeks later… my Right Hand is still shaking, causing a lot of problems in my daily life. Making me feel totally useless at times, coz I am so used to helping others, having other people feed me and assist me, makes me feel like I’ve aged 50 years in two weeks. I am used to feeding the elderly because they are incapable to do it themselves, but for a 20 year old with a clear mental status, it really doesn’t do me much justice, and just makes me feel like a burden to people.

I reckon I also jinx myself too much. In hospital, the nurse had this massive 10cm needle and filling it up for another patient, then saying to me “you’ll be looked at next” to which my response was “…that’s not for me is it?…” just to kid around, but when it came to me, I had to have the exact treatment, but three of them 10cm needles!!! Then after a few days of the persistent tremor, thinking I have Parkinsons…then actually getting prescribed a tablet used for Parkinsons disease to ease the shaking…YES I’m getting scared alright!!!!

So back in Melbourne, I had to check up on a blood test result I got done before going away. Coming back and saying I need to get another blood sample coz I have a possible blood clot problem. The pathology nurse stabbed my good arm badly which left a long bruise on the inside of my left arm, size 10cm by 3cm, to which I’m constantly getting more bruises ontop of it. Reason being, YES I do have a blood problem, I bruise easily and need to see a haematology specialist @ Box Hill Hospital.

I asked the same doctor what he reckoned of my shaking hand, and he looked at it with a big question mark printed on his head…. and saying “wait and see, come back in a week if it’s still shaking”…so I go back the week after finishing my oral antibiotics, he says exactly the same thing. Prompting me to go see another doctor for another opinion.

The second doctor reckons the bite, the hand tremor and the blood clot problem are all separated problems. In my head, I’m already screaming “AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!” So, because I’m still feeling dizzy, and that it could be related to the nervous system in my brain, I’m getting referred to a neurologist, but that ain’t till TWO F*N WEEKS LATER!!!!!!!!!!! Day after my mid-semester exam :S

And the second time I went to see the doctor again, was because I had cold symptoms that hadn’t gone away, coz I have a crap immune system, and none of that Codral, cold and flu, antihistimine, Phernegan stuff works on me. Apparently another problem arises, I have a virus, and didn’t get a prescription for that, but to only eat panadols, coz he had also started me on the Parkinsons tablet that was gonna make me pretty weak and all.

After getting the prescribed a Parkinsons tablet, I am freaking out inside, I go back to work to get the rest of the week off for feeling ill. I am basically in tears, thinking I have Parkinsons at age 20. The managers are all comforting me and took me to Box Hill Hospital for a third doctors opinion, which has since put me at ease a little more.

Maybe I am a nervous person, well WHO AIN’T!?!? You would be too, if you realise you can’t write and do all the things you used to do for fun (pool, bowling, eat, drive….). I can’t just suddenly train myself to be a left-hander, after 20 years of being a right-hander, it’s not easy AT ALL!!!!

All this is screwing up my academic side, coz I can’t write, I can’t do exams, and yes I might fail again. Asking my faculty whether I could get disability services, getting a NO response because it’s not an ongoing medical/psychological problem. I start my appeal on the lecturers and tutors to give me a chance to pass. I don’t want to fail again……

I just REALLY, REALLY, REALLY want to wake up and have everything perfect again…but it’s not happening. I don’t want to be like this forever.

This Parkinsons tablet makes me feel worse. I actually shake more, and my other limbs are twitching or numb, I’ve lost feeling in my fingers, dry mouth, nauseous and delusional, I am seeing things even when my eyes are closed, and hearing chime noises…I think I’m going mad.

Truly appreciated from the bottom of my heart.


Sunday, 9 March 2008


Have you ever smelt something that sparked a memory?

Most smells may make you wanna repulse and back away, or even a common laugh. (yep I am talking about those farters, who fart for pure amusement) but NO I am not talking about fart sparking memories...unless they do to you (LOL)

But aroma? They could be the smell of good food that will make you crave everytime you get a sniff of it. How cool would it be if smell could sell? Yes there are frangrances...sweet, musk, whatever...normally in your drawer liners. But here I'm talking about...what if there was such thing as "The big fat book of wonderful smells" (minus fat if that offends people, big if you want to too).

What sparked this post? Yep...that IS correct, smell....why is this sounding more like an episode of Sesame Street...and todays word is smell. S-M-E-L-L it also rhymes with well, and Dell, and swell...whatevers Wendy!

Nah, but I was working on alot of shoe cages (a cage with alot of boxes of shoes FYI) and I was opening and sniffing them (no not a shoe smell addict), and the smell that sorta dispersed from them reminded me, some memories recent, and some quite distant. I know alot of people will stand in the shoe department thinking "MEH this stinks, let's move" ...YES I do too. But that's because it's the new odours of people trying them on, that make people repulse.

New shoes that come in, smell quite leathery, plasticey, rubbery. Not a great description but I'm talking about the point the knife cuts open the thick sticky tape that reveals a box of 9/12/15 pair of shoes all neatly stuffed with paper in a grid, and a sudden smell that intoxicates you.

A box of winter slippers - reminded me of the alcoholic shot 'Cowboys'
A box of crocs - reminded me of those rubbery things they use to give out on planes when you were a little kid for free...until you got to the age where your passport says you're too old and have to request a kid set from the air those were the good old days.
A box of leather boots- reminded me of when mum use to sew big fat leather jackets for earn a few extra $$$ which made the whole garage smell like cows. Don't get me wrong walking past leather jackets still reminds me of that smell.

If it's certain smells that spark your memory up a box of shoes TODAY

Which led me to search up smell in the images of google.
Check it out, I reckon it's funny. If not google "Jaf project Smell Ya later"

Monday, 24 September 2007

What IS the point of clubbing???

a) to get molested
b) to molest others
c) to get wasted till you have to get kicked out through the 'passing out' aisle
d) to stand and pretend to dance to earblasting music

I'd say all the above

Not that I WANT to get molested or molest others, but 'what would you do' if some pretty HUGE guy comes up to you from behind on the dancefloor and stick his hands in the wrong area (when I don't even know him), and at the same time pull my hand towards his privates???

Can't someone have a good time without necessarily getting ANY attention??? It's times in clubs that I would rather be the ugliest chick alive, but then again the ugliest chick gets attention too, for being ugly....but who cares, THIS IS THE CLUBBING SCENE!!!

Sometimes I would go to a club by myself, but would be missing the person whose supposed to be 'watching out' for me. Get wasted and TOTALLY not have to remember a thing about what happened last night...not the case, I remember stuff, and have horrible after affects. DSRS(DSRS defined) it doesn't matter one drink or many, it still happens and lasts...a long long while (or that I just haven't been feeling all too good this time).

I guess it's just called an experience that needs to be recorded down

Next clubbing scene 'the Wendz' will be at:
Time: 10pm till late
Time and Place Start Time: Thursday, September 27, 2007 at 10:00pm
End Time: Friday, September 28, 2007 at 4:00am
Location: Shed 9, Central Pier, 161 Harbour Esplanade, Docklands

General Admission: $25

Note to self next time: "Prepare to be molested"
I don't wanna be the sober one EVER

Saturday, 21 July 2007

Hunting poo-poo man

Hunting poo-poo man...what's that all about?

Well I went to work from 5.30-10pm last night, I had to walk through the front doors to start my shift, when walking through I see all these Safety yellow signs near the store entrance, and slight wet marks, and a poor cleaner trying to mop up something. I walked past thinking it smelt like vomit or something, but then I think to myself, that's pretty impressive to be spewing for 5 metres plus.

Not thinking much of it, I continued walking to the back of the store to the reception to clock-in. Back on the floor, all the managers are gathering round discussing the atrocity of the matter. It was a 30 or so year old man shitting himself that distance. Dribble and wet...seriously WEAR A NAPPY THEN. But my manager was like a metre of this actually occuring, a man walking past with a dark long jacket and this yellowy substance following him. My manager was walking to the refunds desk, thinks what on earth the liquid is, realises it and dodges it as the smell gave it away. Then after the matter, they reviewed the security camera footage and YEP the guy is indeed a running-walking poo-poo man. My manager was spraying lotsa perfume, but still it didn't cover the stench.

And to think this is during a TOY SALE where lotsa family members with kids are shopping trolley worth of toys, and NOT knowing they are walking around the store with shit residue on their bad. We wanted sales, so it's best not to tell them "sorry you just stood in crap, happy shopping" that would be wrong, and we wouldn't have made budget. But we did, and blew the budget, so that's good.

But when I came in, Poo-poo man was gone, my other manager was like "should we contact security and get them onto him, he might be shitting himself all over the complex". I sorta feel bad for him for having such a disorder, but moreso sorry for all the customers and employees that have to witness or endure the after effects of Poo-poo man.


Friday, 20 July 2007

Dissappointing really

Dissappointing really

Choking can result in unconsciousness and cardiopulmonary arrest. It is often caused by food or other foreign body lodged in the throat (airway). Indeed, choking caused by foreign body airway obstruction accounts for about 3,000 deaths each year. The recognition and proper management of choking is of key importance to safety in homes, restaurants, and other public places.

I should pick up first aid again, even if it is to save my OWN LIFE. I would definitely come in handy for every dying situation I might get into again, seriously... I have been thinking about the redoing the first aid course for a long while, but First Aid Workplace level 2 = $175. I've done it before, maybe I'll just redo the CPR refresher course...dunno, I didn't really pass the test back in year 10, but they gave the certificate to me anyways.

My dying moment: I came home at 8pm, I had work at 9pm to 12am, so I was rushing dinner a bit. Dinner was lamb chops and vegies. My sister was at the TV playing Mario on the Nintendo Wii, mum was cooking so wasn't keeping an eye on me.

Here I am, forking and steak knifing the lamb chop, I should have either sliced it smaller, chewed it longer, or SHUT UP and EAT...but I choked on this lamb piece, like half in-half out, and seriously seeing my death coming quickly, I was crying, and trying to cough it out for about 30seconds or more.

I think I was definitely changing colour, I could feel it. I'm mostly dissappointed that my sis and mum are both there watching and hearing me choke to death. Mum forgiven since she was watching the stove, so she had a 'burn the house down' or 'watch daughter die' scenario, obviously me less important.

But my sis could have stopped playing, chucked the Wii controller, ran to the dinner table and given me some assistance or something. NO she turned round and just looked.

No chance, I had to SAVE myself, I actually stuck my hand in my mouth the remove the "foreign object" and eventually relieved my airway stress and was able to breathe again. But it was scary.

But after I caught my breath again, I sorta cracked it at her. Her words were "I don't know first aid, what was I suppose to do?...I have my mobile next to me, I can call for an ambulance if you needed it"

But come'on u stared for 30seconds, how long would it take to actually get onto that 000 call and actually follow their instructions, I woulda passed out already.

Dissappointed really, quite dissappointed.

AS for mum, yeah she knows first aid(sorta, hers expired WAY before mine) but she definitely knows what to do in a choking scenario, seeing she works at a nursing home, and choking is common for old folks, hence title of "grandma food" comes along. I call lamb shanks grandma food, I shoulda asked mum for some lamb shanks eh?

But whilst I was choking, the only person in my vision was my sister, I couldn't see my mum coz she was on the side of me, but my sister was in my general view; STRAIGHT AHEAD.

Sigh, I don't know whether I'll learn from my choking mistake, because I swear I've choked on food many times before, but nothing like lamb, perhaps a fish bone or a vegie, but MEAT is definitely a major killer to the 3000 deaths a year I reckon.

SO incase of someone choking, this is what to do: First thing is first, if you are the choker, try and prevent this scenario from happening; cut pieces smaller; chew food slowly and thoroughly; avoid talking, chewing and swallowing; and avoid excessive alcohol intake before and during a meal.

If person is conscious: ask if they are choking, if they can speak, cough or breathe it means they're trying to clear the airway and possible of expelling the foreign object. However if they cannot speak, cough or breathe, give abdominal thrusts from behind to help the victim expell the object. IF persons is obese or pregant, use chest thrusts. Continue until the obstruction is relieved. If victim is uncomfortable seek medical advice.

If person is unconscious, position victime on their back, with their arms on their sides, ask for assistance, call for emergency. Lift chin up, and try and remove foreign object with fingers, in cases it could be their tongue blocking airway, try and move it out. If unsuccessful give 6-10 abdominal thrusts. Once removed, begin ABC's of CPR.

A- Airway
  • Place victim flat on his/her back on a hard surface.
  • Shake victim at the shoulders and shout "are you okay?"
  • If no response, call emergency 000 then,
  • Head-tilt/chin-lift - open victims' airway by tilting their head back with one hand while lifting up their chin with your other hand.
B- Breathing
  • Position your cheek close to victims' nose and mouth, look toward victims' chest, and
  • Look, listen, and feel for breathing (5-10 seconds)
  • If not breathing, pinch victim's nose closed and give 2 full breaths into victim's mouth
  • If breaths won't go in, reposition head and try again to give breaths. If still blocked, perform abdominal thrusts
C- Circulation
  • Check for carotid pulse by feeling for 5-10 seconds at side of victims' neck.
  • If there is a pulse but victim is not breathing, give Rescue breathing at rate of 1 breath every 5 seconds Or 12 breaths per minute
  • If there is no pulse, begin chest compressions as follows:
  • Place heel of one hand on lower part of victim's sternum. With your other hand directly on top of first hand, Depress sternum 1.5 to 2 inches.
  • Perform 15 compressions to every 2 breaths. (rate: 80-100 per minute)
  • check for return of pulse every minute.
Seek medical assistance straight after.
I truly worry the next time I choke, and when I become unconscious, who'll CPR me if I'm not there to save myself???

Friday, 8 June 2007

Mummy tells me I'm not breastfed :(

Friday, June 08, 2007

Mummy tells me I'm not breastfed :(

Oh seriously I have no idea how da heck I got onto this topic, but I must have asked mum THAT somewhere along the way of a conversation. And she tells me that Jennifer was breastfed, and Jackie was breastfed and I WASN'T.

See rivalry at birth already. Perhaps that's what makes me different from the others, and ...more normal
But its been said that babies that are breastfed at birth tend to be more smart...well I say scientific evidence proved that wrong, and us FORMULA babies that RULE!!!! LOL I dun remember what formula I had though, so I can't recommend which baby milk powder would make your children, smart like me

Then makes me wonder... if I was a premature baby, then why I didn't I get mummys milk? HEHE sorry, funny topic, gotta laugh my way through. And fat arse bro was born late, and wouldn't come out till CHRISTMAS DAY!!! I have legitimate reasons to call him that, coz a) he WAS a big fat baby, that was overweight and just wouldn't come out and b) he STILL is a fat arse bro, who does everything late.

Lil' sis also wasn't born to be the beautifulest of babies, at birth, she looked like a little brother, that suddenly grew up to be a beautiful girl. I feel bad now that I always teased her, that she wasn't mum and dads, and that she was probably swapped at birth, or the nurses got it all wrong, but that's only because the parents and relatives always wondered who this little girl looked like in terms of genetics. She doesn't really look like any of the family. But now people say she looks like me. HEY I didn't give birth to her...why look at me?

Sorry bout the high ego here, but I was the cutest baby of the bunch, coz I was little, and looked like the parents. Seriously I compare my baby photo, to my dads baby photo, we look quite alike, when I looked at it, I wondered if that was me in the black and white photo.
Now, ever since like forever, when I walk round with mum it's "oh mother and daughter, you two look alike" which mum would always sarcastically go "hehe we're sisters" just to make herself sound younger, or that I was compared to my HK cousin, "Oh it's “Stanley Ngs' younger sister" funny that, we both have the same surname too, so that didn't bother me as such, plus I never really lived in HK, so I wouldn't have a clue.

Where was I? Breast milk!!
Apparently the benefits of the above include:
  • Protection from gastrointestinal troubles, respiratory problems, ear infections- no wonder I have so much gas JK, had asthma as a kid, and ear infections HRMMM does having dreams of being deaf count?
  • Reduction of developing allergies- why yes I have allergies to YOU...JK but I generally get hayfever the easiest, allergy to flowers, pollen, lawn, cats, lotsa furry things, YEP I get sick the most, so when I am sick, noone really cares, coz it's NORMAL for me.
  • Boosts childhood intelligence- I actually felt stupid from Prep to Year 5, it wasn't till the Grade 5 teacher gave me that multiplications tape that I began to increase my IQ. 1x1 is 1, 2x2 is 4, 3x3 is 9....etc. I knew my timestable really well after that, and pretty much advanced in High School maths too.
  • Prevent obesity later in life- Errrr does that mean when I get fat, there's no return I shall have to go on BIG FAT LOSER????
  • Prevent type 1 diabetes- Uh OH, that's why I dun eat as many lollies as other kids, TRUE THAT
  • Prevent premature babies from infection and high blood pressure- makes no sense, I have low blood pressure.
  • Lowers baby's risk of sudden infant death syndrom- MUMMY HOW COULD YOU!?!?!?!?!?
  • Reduces some forms of cancer- oh no, I better get checked for everything then
  • For the mum: helps loose weight, lower stress levels, and prevents osteoperosis- I guess Jennifer and Jackie were just troublesome babies then HAHAHA, I'm also the odd one coz I don't have the letter J in my name, maybe I shall be Judith...NAAAAH
I might find that baby pic of me and dad for comparison...some day and recheck my eyes on it LOL