I will make toilets sparkle when I’m angry

I will make toilets sparkle when I’m angry Yes it’s true, it’s my form of anger management, a good productive form of my stress and anger management; cleaning compulsively. It is surely a better way than destroying or wasting things or alternatively keeping it all locked up waiting to explode. Problem is that I don’t often get angry/pissed off/stressed out all that often, so therefore the toilet gets a bit neglected sometimes :P But when I am, it’s definitely not only the toilet sparkling, but much of the house, the entire bathroom would sparkle like Cleaning Aid ads, and I would vacuum and possibly mop the house as well, depending on the anger level and how much energy I actually have(which ain’t much), plus the house is huge. So far since my parents have gone overseas for like a month or so, I have been placed with the key of responsibility, so I can’t say its complete independence. And I don’t understand how people say “oh freedom” to my parents going overseas. It is definitely not the case. It would be if I completely didn’t have to care about their matters and their other two children; my brother and sister =.=” Yes, tis them two that pisses me off the most, their lack of initiative, their lack of consideration, and their lack of …. BAH I’ll just say everything. My younger sister not so bad, in that she does understand that I have been placed with the burden of many other roles in the family, but not …complete understanding. She plays little part in the other activities that I have had to take on as well, using VCE as an excuse. I mean I do feel her, that VCE is indeed a tiresome period, but I’ve gone through that too, it needs time management, what really bugs me is that she would use VCE as an excuse to get out of chores, but she OFTEN comes home to sleep, watch TV and fall asleep, weekends-sleep, and when she sleeps…IT’S VERY VERY HARD TO WAKE HER UP AGAIN, and I am serious, trying to get her up for dinner is not an easy task, prod her, poke her, nudge her, slap her if you must, she’ll open her eyes, blink and go back to sleep…maybe not to the slap one, maybe she’ll respond by getting pissed off for a sec, turn to the other side and maybe cry her way back to sleeping, but then when she does wake up again by herself, she’s like “why didn’t you wake me up?” AS IF I DIDN’T!!! LOL as if she’s forgotten everything I’ve done to her in the process of getting her up, funny but also annoying at the same time. The other one, SIGH SIGH SIGH is all that comes out from inside the family, parents as well, we all have little hope in him, at the age of 23, you’d reckon he would be independent and show consideration to people and objects, know that life ain’t easy, and BE NICE!!!! NO He’s not!!! A thing between my sis and I, is that he is only ever nice to “one” of the sisters, which seems to prove true. Most times he was nice to me, as in yeah he might shout me a stupid slushie, meal or something, coz I tend to drive him home from work most times(15 minute walk)…but after I purchased the Nintendo Wii for him, he has began to bond more with my sister, who are both obsessed with video games(well my sis still plays Neopets, if you get me) as for me, I only have a short attention span to video games, definitely not a compulsive side of myself. So a week of Wii playing for me, it doesn’t fancy me, or that I realise that there are many more things in life to look forward to. Back to the idiot of a brother, I really have to try not elaborate too much from previous blogs, 23, yep no licence; doesn’t plan to get it, no girlfriend; doesn’t really care, friends; doubt he has any, still plays Magic cards on a regular basis, spending maybe hundreds/fortunes on these cards, seriously these cards were a hit in 1997 or something, when I was in grade four, but come’on TEN YEARS AGO GET OVER IT!!! It annoys the whole family when he receives another piece of cardboard print in the mail, coz we know it as … yet another Magic card. To this day, he probably has a wardrobe full of them. He has lived behind the garage(the old sewing room) for more than 10 years now, coz he wanted to, excluding himself from the family(maybe, dunno), but doesn’t contribute to the family, only enters the house for meals, meals and maybe a piss and shower. Meals ARGH don’t get me started, first words I ever hear come from him are “what’s for dinner tonight” or “when’s mum coming home” (coz mum often cooks, but I have been of late)…when I’m not home, coz I’ve gone out, he’s too lazy to even walk to the microwave for god’s sake( =.=” x1000000000000……) Tell him to go put his clothes to his room…nothing happens, his clothes live in the kitchen, it’s as if his wardrobe/living quarters is in the kitchen, coz it’s where he plays the Wii, watch TV etc etc, despite him already having a TV in his room. He lounges everywhere, and his sight in the house ain’t pleasant. On hot days, might see him half nude, and he is very, very bulgy, close to pregnancy and ready to give birth. Doesn’t participate in the chores AT ALL, demands a lot, has a job but doesn’t intend on paying his HECS back, doesn’t give boarding fees to my mum for his living (I would when I turn 21, law states legally parents have to take care of their children to the age of 21, so maybe I’ll move out before then). This week I tried seeing how long before one of them realise that the rubbish bin in the kitchen is overflowing and foul and would take initiative to take the trash out(simple test eh?) …WELL the answer, TOO LONG!!! None of them took the initiative, and just added and added, till I couldn’t even tie it, and so I had to take it out, HUFFLE PUFF, BAAA HUMBUG!!! SHYZEN-HYZEN (these words are my alternatives to swearing, i.e. SHIT, FUCK and whatever, coz I hear it too often towards me… I hate hearing these words) Cooking, simple, if you don’t like my cooking, don’t eat it, don’t eat and complain, just because it doesn’t tickle your distinct fatty tastebuds. Seriously I haven’t even been eating much, why do I even have to cook, coz I would just skip it, but NO the demands of eating is soooo high, I must. If I didn’t cook, maybe he’ll go make himself some Mi Goreng or eat a meat-pie…but never occurs to him that there are people who actually go out and buy these things (ME ME ME ME ME, designated shopper atm) Laundry, hehe yeah I might not be too good with this field, but I still know how to do it, just a warning: DO NOT MIX CLOTHES WITH A HIGH TENDENCY TO DYE OTHERS TOGETHER, =.=” to myself this time, I made some clothes purple, but I’m not fussed, coz most of it was my clothes anyway, but still absolute pain in the arse, having to do others, who aren’t even wary that they actually have clean clothes to wear. Ontop of the, may I say chores of life, I have had the financial matters and incoming mail. Yeah it might sound like nothing, opening mail, okay bill left hand side, statement right hand side, junk mail recycling. But our house gets a pile 1cm high everyday of this nightmare. Why? Coz my parents own many properties, and manages also many of our uncles, total um more than a handful. NOTE: I’m not rich, all are mortgaged properties that require payment every month, I don’t know how many we actually own outright, maybe the one we live in, but not sure. Okay I can be considered rich for a 19 year old, considering I have more than 10 grand in my mum’s account, good saving plan, that is the key to a good retirement, hehe :P But don’t rob me, just coz I said that. Plus other things, that have bothered me of recent have caused me to blow and result in excessive cleaning. I don’t remember how this funny sort of anger/stress relief disorder had occurred, but I remembered this movie starring Sammi Cheng in that she would clean toilets when she was in a confused mood (not sure if it was confused, but something along those lines) sometimes she would get to a point that she just needed to clean a toilet, even if it were public ones. It was a funny movie I remembered…I really need to go see a movie soon, before I start cleaning uni toilets :P To this day and age, I still don’t have much confidence in guys in that they will treat me right, maybe on the factors that the guys in my life have been a complete arsehole to me, or haven’t existed much, yeah dad hasn’t been around much, a weekend once a fortnight for the past 10+ years, too difficult, guess he’s never had a father figure, to know how to be a father figure in his own time. Hence feeling frigidity (not the SAD-sexual arousal disorder, but the extreme lack of warmth). I mean I look at my sister and his boyfriend (nah haven’t seen him, or really know bout him) and think, if only someone that persistent in courting and keeping their other half happy (it’s a thought just a thought LIFE FOR RENT-DIDO) happened to me, okay been watching too much Korean drama, but come’ on, all girls want something like that to happen. But when it does, I don’t know how to respond. Love is supposed to compliment life, not destroy it, if it is, is it time to end the relationship, even though it may not have even started?...I dunno…… Told you my blogs were longer than essays